I jerked off for the first time when I was 13 years old, listening to “Let The Beat Control Your Body” by 2 Unlimited, and watching national TV broadcasting images of a performance by Fura dels Baus in Lisbon (which was at the time the European Cultural Capital), all at the same time. In that moment, I took the decision to praise Life (rather than art), by promoting my dick to the role of Big Brother — an ethical (therefore aesthetic) compromise that remained intact until today. It was the nineties, when po-mo rhetorics turned the words misconception, imprecision, ambiguity, androgyny, perversion, subversion, rebellion and provocation into art. My phallocentrism is NOT part of that semantic field, though. That’s why my performances (especially the “social” ones) are resigned performances — I am a dick’o’sexual. To boycott the prevailing rhetoric does not presuppose a nostalgic act. This performance is not nostalgic. It is from now. It is an event sponsored by Taschen ‘Art Now’ series. Welcome to 1994. Welcome to Now™!